![]() ![]() Reading between the lines, I suspect Jenny has some deep-rooted insecurities that get triggered whenever she sees Janae going at a different pace. Should Jenny leave Janae to her own workout routine? ![]() Why waste your time? The jury of Guardian readers I am slightly obsessed with the gym – I just think that if you’re there you may as well be fully there and workout, rather than doing nothing. Janae needs to get serious when she’s with me. The personal trainers at the gym recognise us and often come over and ask: “Are you actually going to do anything today?” I’ll say: “Of course you haven’t, that’s because you’ve been scrolling on your phone.” It’s not just me who thinks that Janae’s behaviour is ridiculous. I’ll be ready to leave and she’ll say: “Oh, can we stay longer, I haven’t worked out that much.” I like to be in and out of the gym in an hour, but Janae wants to stay for two hours. But I’ll look over later and she’s not doing much. I’ll offer to work out with her, but she’ll say she wants to do her own thing. And when we get to the gym, Janae is often on her phone the whole time. Sometimes, before we head out, Janae will say she doesn’t want to go, and I have to motivate her into getting there. It’s not just me who thinks that Janae’s behaviour is ridiculous. I think that is wasting the whole day, but I’m in a relationship with her so I compromise. Janae prefers to wake up late, have a coffee and go to the gym at 2pm. I prefer to get my exercise out of the way, and to relax in the evenings. I used to go to the gym at 7am, but Janae wants to go in the middle of the day or late at night. She comes to the gym to gossip with her friends, or waste time watching videos on her phone. Janae also goes to the gym, but not in the same way as me. Working out makes me feel better about myself. The gym is my happy place, somewhere I can just put headphones in and be stress-free. I love going to the gym, but since I’ve been with Janae I’ve made sacrifices when it comes to how I work out. I like to be in and out in an hour, but Janae wastes so much time She needs to change tack or I’ll stop going. ![]() I’ll suggest going to grab a coffee or meeting people in the pub and she’ll make excuses, like “I don’t feel well.” I’ll reply: “Oh, so no gym then?” But she’ll still go. She wants a fitness-fanatic girlfriend, and I feel inadequate next to her at times. ![]() She will wake up early, do yoga, go for a run, then go to the gym. We’ve been together for a year and she’s always been like this. Jenny prioritises the gym over everything. The gym should be a place for me to unwind, too. I hate it when she comes up behind me and watches what I’m doing on my phone, before making a comment. I find that triggering and we’ve had fights in the gym before. When I work out in a more chilled way, or I’m on my phone, she’ll come over and drop a snarky one-liner like, “Ha! Classic!”, then walk off. Sometimes I try to join in with Jenny’s hardcore workouts, but she never praises me when I do. Guys, including bodybuilders, come up to me in the gym and say: “Your girlfriend motivates me to go harder.” She loves that. She will wake up early, do yoga, go for a run and then go to the gym – it’s unreal I don’t push hard every time, but I think that’s normal – and I can’t believe that me going five times a week isn’t good enough for Jenny. We go five times a week, though if it was up to me I’d probably only go twice. She often has a go at me and questions why I go with her. I’m not sure what her problem is it’s not like I’m making her run slower by being on my phone. She moans at me and says: “All you do is go on your phone.” But I’m doing light exercises and chill workouts, whereas she goes hard every time with her high-interval training. My girlfriend, Jenny, and I go to the gym together, and she’s constantly judging me while I’m working out. ![]()
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